Sep 15, 2017 in Psychology

Death of a relative or close person is always a difficult emotional trauma for a person. Almost all people have close ties and with their loss begin to feel lonely. Such event always happens during one's life, sometimes in numerous occasions. A person always grieves in a particular way when they lose a friend, relative or loved one. People that surround the person usually have lots of ideas how to calm a person saying. Be strong! Everything will be all right! etc.

What Do People Feel?

  • At first, the person usually experiences shock, especially when the death of a close person is not a consequence of long-lasting sickness during which one gets used to the thought that one day it will happen. It is difficult for the person to believe that someone they love disappeared from their life forever. The person feels overwhelmed with thoughts and it is hard for them to concentrate on other things.
  • Sometimes a person also experiences health problems: nausea, headaches and other types of pain. Some people can experience the so-called searching syndrome, when the person looks for the one they lost in public places and everywhere they used to spend time together.
  • Moreover, the person might have nightmares or dreams that the person is still alive.

Lisa's Story

Lisa was 19 when her beloved grandmother died in a car crash. Grandmother was returning from their summer house at the evening, after a day of planting and gardening, and was pretty tired. She crossed a road in the place she always did to wait for a bus that would take her to the city. She didn't notice a car that drove fast from the right when she almost reached the bus stop. The last thing she felt was a powerful crash from the right.

Lisa understood that something was wrong when she came from a walk at 8 p.m. and saw their apartment empty. After a while, her mother and father returned from work. She saw her mother’s face and she was shocked that it had such a visible expression of despair. Lisa's grandmother never returned home after 6 p.m., she was very punctual and never visited any friends on her way home. Lisa's parents drove to their summer house and discovered that there was a car crash and that one woman died. After that there were no doubts that Lisa no longer had a grandmother.

Lisa had never lost anyone in her life and was shocked as never before. Her granny was a very close friend to her, and since birth they all lived together. At first, she could not realize that this happened. Two days later she saw her granny on the funeral and still could not understand what was going on, why there were so mane strange people around and when it would end.

Only a week after that day, Lisa finally realized that her grandmother was dead. She was frightened of that new feeling and could not understand why such an unfair thing happened. Her grandmother, although old, was very lively and full of energy, and could live a long and happy life, but instead she was lying now in the cold grave and Lisa would never see her again. The car driver was made to pay the compensation, and their family received an amount of money their family had to work for during two years to get it, but this did not make Lisa any happier. She refused to go to school and to see her schoolmates, she did not want to hear their happy voices. All she wanted was to stay alone.

A month passed in complete depression, and then her mother made her go to school. Lisa understood that she forgot about her grief when studying. The lessons distracted her from bad thoughts. She was still weak and nervous, but the pain and the fear were gradually disappearing. She tried to cheer up her mother who felt completely perplexed after this event. After three months, they could live their normal life, with only one change: now they were a family of three.

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